229. “I’m almost 50 and have nothing to show for my life”
Money For Couples with Ramit Sethi
What Childhood Money Lessons Shaped You?
Ramit asks about family money histories; Thad and Christine explain growing up poor or lower-middle-class and learned behaviors.
Christine (47) and Thad (57) have been together for more than six years, but instead of building wealth, they’re buried under nearly $340,000 of debt.
Christine, the self-appointed “CFO,” is exhausted from tracking every bill, while Thad avoids the details and spends freely. Their conflicting money mindsets (Christine craving stability, Thad living for the moment) have stalled their big dreams like buying a home or taking Rich Life vacations that Christine longs for. With almost no savings and retirement looming, Christine fears she’s approaching 50 with nothing to show for her hard work, while Thad insists a single plan will solve everything.
Can Ramit help them break the cycle of avoidance and control, align their priorities, and finally start acting like teammates?
In this episode we uncover:
• Why Christine feels she’s approaching 50 with “nothing to show” for her life
• Thad’s $17,000 student loan that ballooned up to $125,000
• How Christine became the household “CFO” while Thad continues to avoid responsibility
• Their real numbers—and why Christine feels so stressed
• Christine’s frustration over micromanaging bills
• Thad’s upbringing in poverty
• The invisible power of shame and fear, and why they can’t see what’s right in front of them financially
• Christine’s childhood lessons from parents who bought an unaffordable home
• Thad’s stark admission: if nothing changes, he’ll be homeless
Chapters:
(00:00:00) When a worrier and an avoider meet…
(00:02:59) “We have a plan… don’t we?”
(00:15:52) “Where is all the money going?”
(00:19:54) Ramit breaks down their numbers
(00:33:46) “I never expected to live past 30”
(00:48:30) “I wish my dad was able to say no”
(00:56:33) “I don’t believe he’ll follow through”
(01:05:11) “We need to be playing way bigger”
(01:22:38) “I don’t feel like I have the power”
(01:36:54) Where are they now? Christine and Thad’s follow-ups
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