Do the Work First, Rabbi Donia

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Maimonides says you have to appease the victim. We don't want your words until you've already done the fixing thing. It's awesome, right, Rabbi Donia, when people say they're sorry and then cry and then get very victimy. So that's good, right? The apology all has to be victim to eccentric.

1. Why we should stop expecting people to forgive.

2. Rabbi Danya’s five step-by-step process for repairing a relationship.

3. What makes a good – and a terrible – apology.

4. What to do (and to not say) if you want to make amends and change.

5. Why repentance is a process that has nothing to do with the one who was hurt.

About Rabbi Ruttenberg:

Rabbi Danya Ruttenberg is an award-winning author of 8 books, including On Repentance and Repair: Making Amends in an Unapologetic World. She serves as Scholar in Residence at the National Council of Jewish Women, and her writing has appeared in the New York Times, the Atlantic, Salon, Time, Newsweek, and many other publications.

TW: @TheRaDR

IG: @rabbidanyaruttenberg

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