The Jeselnik & Rosenthal Vanity Project cover image

Workin’ for the Weeknd

The Jeselnik & Rosenthal Vanity Project

CHAPTER

The Good News for Thomas Mustuchus

He said basically he was dead. He is now dead. Why don't you just kill me? That's where it got a little sad or the blowing off steam. I think the cops are like, we get it. We understand that you've gotten caught having sex with the dog and we are going to send you to jail. But the cops must have laughed right in his face because there are people who are like, oh, please kill me. The good news for him is his mom and dad probably are dead. So he won't have to live with that sort of shame. They're up in heaven looking down being like, Oh, no, just happy. Yeah. Funny.

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