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Are You Choosing to Tell Yourself This Negative Version Every Day?
I think what you would find is probably people on both sides are biased to the story that they tell themselves consistently. The process of behavior change almost always starts with self awareness. It's very hard to change it, at least consciously or to design it if you're not aware of it. I've noticed this for myself. Atomic habits comes out and I get a thousand positive comments on Twitter and I just read through them and don't think anything about it. Then you get one negative reply and you spend the whole afternoon thinking about it.