The Importance of Tactics in Relationships

We're so natural to just get defensive or start arguing about something else, argues about memory. But rarely do we sit with that person and be like, what are they actually complaining about or feeling? What did they need from me in this situation? And instead, we both go off the rails. So it is a matter of what can work and what can never work. I can never argue you out of your perception. It'll never happen. There's no question about it."