Pickles. It's Dog of the Year.

Goose the dog's middle name is Montgomery. His surname is Simpson, which is his partner's surname. We didn't discuss who surname the dog would get. The vet just decided. First time we took him to the vet,. Took my partner's name and wrote it down. So he's Goose Montgomery Simpson. I forgot vets do that. It is weird vets. And he vets listening. Some people might go as far as to give their pet a middle name. That's right. But personally there's lots of dogs called Daisy. What name do you want me to put down? We could make up a whole new name for him. Anyway, whatever. Just a patriarchy.

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