The Importance of Co-Regulation and Healing from Trauma

What is Co-Regulation and why is it important in managing emotional difficulties associated with complex trauma?

Co-regulation is a vital concept in trauma recovery, especially when dealing with the emotional challenges of complex trauma. It acts like "training wheels" for emotion regulation, supporting individuals, much like how adults help children until they can self-regulate, thus disrupting the cycle of trauma and promoting emotional stability. Tanner, who explores this concept, believes that self-regulation is key to trauma recovery, while acknowledging the supportive role that friends and partners can play. Her perspective is shaped by the idea of "parts" within oneself—fragmented neural networks formed in childhood—that may impede emotional control in adulthood. By advocating for both internal and external co-regulation dynamics, Tanner highlights its importance in nurturing healthy relationships and fostering self-leadership to break cycles of trauma.

Key TakeAways

- Co-Regulation is crucial in the healing journey from complex trauma, offering a pathway towards internal coherence and emotional stability.

- Distinguishing between emotion regulation and Co-Regulation is important in trauma ecosystems to break cycles of trauma.

- Co-Regulation can result in valuable outcomes in partnering interactions with trauma survivors, offering tools for healing and recovery.

- Co-Regulation involves self-energetic ways to support oneself or others in activating parts and building trust through shared experiences.

- Emphasizing co-regulation leads to a new way of showing support through collective consciousness raising, nurturing coping skills, and reducing stress.

Actionable Insights

- Emphasize the significance of Co-Regulation in the healing journey from complex trauma

- Distinguish between emotion regulation and Co-Regulation for effective parenting and breaking cycles of trauma

- Seek co-regulatory support from others to enhance emotional regulation and change relational dynamics

- Tap into Self Energy and navigate through different energetic signatures for harmonizing protective instincts

- Increase awareness to control emotions through collective consciousness raising and nurturing coping skills

Quotes 

“Co-regulation is a really important aspect of being human.” — Tanner  [03:19]

“We run out of options when we become an adult for really deep ongoing consistent co-regulatory support.” — Tanner  [09:47]

“As an adult, you have difficulty controlling your emotions because you likely have 7 to 10 protective parts of you that are responding to any emotions in your relational field, both inside and out, with pretty well-developed survival instincts.” — Tanner [11:24]

“It’s not the emotions that are difficult to control, it’s the fucking Protective Part energy that thinks the emotions of ours or somebody else are literally going to kill us. And that’s what’s difficult to hold.” — Tanner [14:01]

“Ultimately on a healing journey, we’re separating our emotions from fear, from survival instinct.” — Tanner  [15:38]

“That’s a large portion of the [healing] journey is just to arrive in your Power Core where you recognize ‘This Is Me’.” — Tanner [20:20]