The Magnitude of a Neutron Star

You'd have to be like an Olympic strongman or strong woman to be able to stand up on a neutron star without being crushed or pulled apart by its tidal forces. Good news is I could scale the tallest mountain. Bad news. All my bones would be jelly. And so these pulsars are not actually variable in that sense. Their beam is constant but if the beam sweeps by you, it seems variable because it sweeps over you and then it passes you and then It comes back again.