Comedian Refuses to Perform Because of Assistance Dog

We pick over the bones of the election that had just about everything … apart from a result. Jetten just about edges out Wilders, Yesilgöz snatches defeat from the jaws of catastrophe, Bontenbal and Eerdmans console themselves with huge gains and Van Hijum starts browsing brochures for Sint Eustatius. Eight so-called sovereign citizens are charged with forming a senior citizens' terror cell. Amsterdam sells itself short with its 750th birthday cake. And in sport, Katwijk's goalkeeper suffers from premature jubilation while Vitesse Arnhem's legal headaches continue.