How to Get to Know a Person Before a First Date

i'm so tired of guys treating me like a list of fetishes, and who will then insist that you check out their fete life page before your first date. I want to go on a date with someone, have a cup of coffee, go for a walk in the park, talk about life and get to know them as a person. i actually tell people not to send me their fetlife profiles before i have a first day with them because i like to know who they are as a person without any preconceived notions. It's amazing the number of women on line that will do this - it is just insane. And what was almost as bad was the fact that she was willing