The Pragmatic, the Instrumental, and the Principal Argument

In a time when people so quickly want to choose a side that's based on winning against the enemy, rather than making sure that we share a common game. How would you habituate people to engage in arguments an good faith? I have two things that i usually try to argue, and one is pragmatic, instrumental, and other one is principled. You know, if i just say to you, you're awful, you're bad. Your view is immoral, that's not necessarily treating you as a moral agent capable of making your own moral judgment. It's only respectful of your moral capacity if i can try to uncover why you think what you think, and walk with you through the reasoning