We all know smart people make dumb decisions. But why?
- Why do gamblers double down when they should walk away?
- Why do we check our phones 58 times a day?
- Why do people micromanage their partners and get confused when they become distant?
We are all suckers for the illusion of control.
We are convinced that our meddling is needed to achieve our desired outcome. Sadly this misses the important fact that we are causing all our problems.
The episode covers all sorts of personal problems from addictions to relationships, investing to anger and how control is at the heart of our problems.
Whether you are high on neuroticism or curious about how the mind works we have a tonne of good stuff:
- Recognize your "control triggers" – situations where your grip tightens and makes things worse
- Practice intentional surrendering in low-stakes situations to build your letting-go muscles
- Replace control with curiosity by asking "What happens if I don't try to fix this?"
Learn to stop wrestling with life and start dancing with it.
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Related Episodes
- 5 Science-backed ways to stop disappointing yourself - Spotify - Apple
- The Psychology of Mistakes - 7 types of lazy thinking - Spotify - Apple
- 4 Hidden fears that sabotage your life - and what to do about them - Spotify - Apple
Get in Touch
👋 Free Call - Schedule Link - https://cal.com/samwebster/mindset
📧 Email - GrowthMindsetPodcast (@) gmail,com
Growth Mindset Psychology:
Sam Webster explores the psychology of happiness, satisfaction, purpose, and growth through the lens of self-improvement.
📺 Watch - YouTube (Growth Mindset)
🛜 Website - Growth Mindset
Show: Growth Mindset, psychology of self-improvement
Episode: The psychology of control - why your brain overcomplicates everything
Chapters:
00:00 Introduction: Why Smart People Make Dumb Decisions
00:30 The Science of Control
02:00 Personal Story: The Quad Bike Incident
05:51 The Illusion of Control
07:02 Addiction and Control
09:03 Reactance Theory: Why We Rebel
10:14 Attachment Styles and Control in Relationships
12:32 Paradoxical Intentions: Embracing the Opposite
15:30 Understanding and Managing Anger
18:43 Quieting the Default Mode Network
20:18 The Joy of Surrender
21:09 Show Updates: Embracing Change
22:58 The New Show Concept: The Psychology of Everything
25:25 The Importance of Growth and Change
26:03 Final Thoughts on Control and Surrender
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