Achievement as a Coping Mechanism

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Why do so many high achievers, perfectionists, and children of immigrants never feel “good enough”, especially around family and the holidays? In one of our most important conversations, we sit down with Jane Marie Chen — Harvard & Stanford grad, award-winning social entrepreneur, and author of the memoir “Like a Wave We Break” — to unpack how childhood trauma, family patterns, and achievement psychology shape our adult lives.

If you’re healing from childhood wounds, trying to forgive your parents, or realizing that achievement has become your coping mechanism… this episode will hit home.

We share:

✅ Why achievement becomes a coping mechanism for so many children of immigrants

✅ How childhood shapes your self-worth, ambition & need to overperform

✅ How trauma lives in the body (and why talk therapy alone can’t release it)

✅ How to set boundaries with family without losing compassion

✅ Why overachievers burn out — and how to stop earning your worth

💚 If you’re struggling with depression or mental health issues, you’re not alone:Call 800-950-6264 or text “NAMI” to 62640.If you’re in crisis, call or text 988.

📖 To order Jane’s memoir: https://www.janemariechen.com/

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⏰ Timestamps

0:00 Our most important episode

1:13 Meet Jane Marie Chen

2:17 Why Jane wrote her memoir

3:30 Burnout, shutdown, and the turning point

6:21 Achievement as a coping mechanism

8:00 Children of immigrants and pressures to succeed

12:35 Trauma in the body and why talk therapy isn’t enough

16:51 Parts Work (explained clearly)

18:57 Giving yourself the words you never got

23:22 Boundaries + family: holding love and limits together

26:46 Being complicit in cycles of abuse

30:14 Power in speaking your truth

32:24 The Whole Body Yes

36:26 The beauty of surrender

40:19 Success without fulfillment is the ultimate failure

42:25 How to start healing when you’ve been numb

43:45 Jane’s next chapter: coaching, alignment & where to find her

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• Built billion-dollar products

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What you’ll get (and keep):

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💛 LET'S CONNECT

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