Emma felt pressure to be herself on camera. But sometimes, if i was being myself, myself wasn't something I really wanted to show. Sometimes there'd be a day where i'd have to film a video, and i be i'm really sad to day. And i would bully myself into pushing through it - covering up my pain. It was a mind fuck for me. On one hand, yes, i'm honest on camera, and i'm unapologetic about that, i say. Yet there were times when i was not fullyBeing honest with the people that watch her vidios. She says: 'You tubers upload every week, or else they fail'