Larry Hagner: The Night I Realized I Was Becoming My Father | DSH #1743
Digital Social Hour
The Drift: how marriage intimacy declines
Larry defines the Drift—partnership loops replacing friendship and intimacy—and its harm to marital connection.
What happens when you grow up without a stable father… then become a dad yourself?
In this episode, Larry (host of Dad Edge / The Good Dad Project) shares a raw, unforgettable story: losing his biological father twice, surviving a fear-based home, and then reconnecting decades later — just in time to break the cycle with his own kids.
What you’ll learn from
👨👦 How father wounds show up in marriage + parenting
🧠 Why “good dads” are built through skills, not luck
❤️ How to rebuild connection after years of distance
🗣️ A conflict framework that stops fights before they explode
🧩 The “Drift” that kills intimacy (and how to reverse it)
🛡️ Why kids need safety more than perfection
🤝 How to fix “rusty friendships” and the male loneliness problem
🔁 How to end generational cycles without becoming cold or distant
10 Chapters (Timestamps)
0:00 – “What if I actually learned how to be a good husband + dad?”
0:30 – Larry’s childhood: divorce, no dad, and the “Are you gonna be my dad?” moment
3:00 – Chaos at home: addiction, abuse, cops, and fear-based parenting
4:30 – Finding his biological father at 12… and losing him again
7:20 – Reuniting at 30 in a Starbucks: the email that changed everything
10:00 – The truth: why his dad left (and the apology they both needed)
13:00 – Why closure matters + how pain shapes parenting
16:30 – The night Larry snapped… and the “don’t hurt me” moment
19:30 – The Good Dad Project starts: surrendering ego + choosing to learn
28:20 – The real crisis: lonely men, rusty friendships, and saving marriages
36:30 – The Drift: partnership loops, intimacy drops, and how to fix it
46:50 – Conflict resolution skill that changed everything (Observation → Thoughts → Feelings → Wants)
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⚠️ DISCLAIMER
The views and opinions expressed by guests on Digital Social Hour are solely those of the individuals appearing on the podcast and do not necessarily reflect the views or opinions of the host, Sean Kelly, or the Digital Social Hour team.
While we encourage open and honest discussions, Sean Kelly is not legally responsible for any statements, claims, or opinions made by guests during the show.
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