What's Behind the Scenes of a Couple's Dance?

The author and her husband co-authored an article about the cycle of criticising, defending, or pursue, withdraw. They also created a dance to help couples understand each other's "survival strategies" A woman whose pursuing may feel lonely and abandoned by her parents when she was a child. The vulnerability is the loneliness or the abandonment feeling. And so she then pursues him. He feels that she's doing it with a critical edge, let's say, and he remembers that his parents were very critical of him,. So his feeling of inadequacy is his a vulnerability. Those are his survival strategies. Then we go to the family of origin. But instead of blaming the partner for what