The Importance of Clarity in Writing

80% of the battle is clarity. chopping out the waffle and the ambiguity. It's stopping your prose sounding like the interminable monologue of a drunk trying to explain phenomenological absolutism to a bin. You don't have toe wiggling in gritty realism or grim psychological thrillers, unless those toes are about to get cut off with a pair of secateurs. So especially this early in the story, you're signaling to the reader that this will be a light read. All three actions here are a bit blaar though and the sequence feels odd. They sound unrelated, like he's cycling through his repertoire of authentic human reactions before powering down. More seriously