Saying No and Declining Invites

Christmas is often described as joyful, but for many neurodivergent people it can be overwhelming, exhausting and full of hidden pressure. In this special episode, Dr Alison Lennox returns to unpack why the festive season can feel so challenging - and how preparation, boundaries and regulation strategies can make a huge difference.

Ben and Alison discuss sensory overload, disrupted routines, family expectations, social fatigue and the pressure to “perform” throughout December. Alison shares practical, compassionate advice on preparing for gatherings, setting boundaries ahead of time, creating exit plans, managing burnout, supporting ND children, and finding small moments to regulate even in busy environments.

Whether you look forward to Christmas or quietly dread it, this episode gives permission to approach the season differently - with clarity, self-compassion and a plan that puts your wellbeing first.

CW: This episode contains discussion of mental health crisis, overwhelm and emotional distress, particularly around the festive period.

If you are struggling, in emotional distress or feel unsafe, please reach out:

• Samaritans (24/7) - Call 116 123 or visit https://www.samaritans.org
• Shout Crisis Textline - Text SHOUT to 85258
• Mind – https://www.mind.org.uk
• NHS 111 (urgent mental health support) – https://www.nhs.uk/nhs-services/mental-health-services
• If you are in immediate danger, call 999 or go to A&E.

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If you would like to support us this Christmas please consider gifting from the below link to spread awareness and carry on the conversation:

https://www.hidden20.org/christmas-grotto

Host: Ben Branson

Production Manager: Phoebe De Leiburné

Video Editor: James Scriven

Social Media Manager: Charlie Young

Music: Jackson Greenberg

Head of Marketing: Kristen Fuller

00:00 Introduction

00:47 Being Neurodivergent at Christmas: Why the Festive Season Is Hard

3:34 Family Expectations, Routines and Holiday Pressure

5:00 Why the Festive Season Can Be Overwhelming for ND People

6:03 First Christmas After an ND Diagnosis: Handling Difficult Family Reactions

10:24 Setting Boundaries Without Guilt & Planning Ahead to Reduce Holiday Stress

14:40 Setting Boundaries Without Shame: ND Social Masking & Avoiding Burnout

25:25 How to Support Neurodivergent Children at Christmas

30:30 Dr Alison’s Top Tips for Setting Healthy Boundaries

34:42 Dr Alison’s Festive Advice for ADHD’ers on Medication

36:00 Alcohol vs Neurodivergent Brains

39:50 The Importance of Preparation for ND Regulation at Christmas

42:39 Managing Sensory Overload & Navigating Christmas Traditions

45:54 What ND People Can Do If They or a Loved One Are in Distress

48:03 Dr Alison’s Final Words of Advice: Q&A From Our Listeners

The Hidden 20% is a charity founded by ADHD & autistic entrepreneur Ben Branson.

Our mission is simple: To change how the world sees neurodivergence.

No more stigma. No more shame. No more silence.

1 in 5 people are neurodivergent. That’s 1.6 billion of us - yet too many are still excluded, misunderstood, or left without support.

To break the cycle, we amplify voices, challenge myths, and keep showing up. Spotlighting stories, stats and hard truths. Smashing stereotypes through honest voices, creative campaigns and research that can’t be ignored.Every month, over 50,000 people turn to The Hidden 20% to feel safe, seen and to learn about brilliant brains.

With your support, we can reach further, grow louder, and keep fighting for the 1 in 5 who deserve more.

Join us at hidden20.org/donate.

Become a monthly donor.

Be part of our community where great minds think differently.

Brought to you by charity The Hidden 20% #1203348

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Instagram / TikTok / Youtube / X: @Hidden20charity

Ben Branson @seedlip_ben

Dr Alison Lennox https://www.dralisonlennox.com/

If you'd like to support The Hidden 20%, you can buy a "green dot" badge at https://www.hidden20.org/thegreendot/p/badge. All proceeds go to the charity.

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