A lot of our sexual response is based on those two systems that are puppeting you just if you understood those a bit more then you could differentiate between like oh here's my natural body response and here's a logical response so i think the best way to describe that again is food where it's like i naturally am drawn to this cake but i'm not going to eat it because it isn't the best cake or the most logical one. A massive thing that is important to build is a muscle that determines the difference between healthy and comfortable and that's for everything in life  and that directly applies to intimacy there's a lot of very comfortable relationships or comfortable activities that aren't healthy for us