4min chapter

Red Scare cover image

Nepo Baby it's Cold Outside

Red Scare

CHAPTER

Sam Bankman Freed - Is He on the Adderall?

Sam Bankman is off the Adderall and has a tan, which always looks good on a man. I think beards are gross, but the clean shaven look is too boyish. If you have like a pancake face, you're going to want some beard. Stouples of five o'clock shadow is hard because it irritates my face. Some folks in the group chat were mocking me for saying that Zelensky could get it. He's always been a one for me. The only way for Jews to look hot is if they look vaguely Muslim or... That's not true.

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