The World Cup is one of my favourite things, but it's organised by these guys. For American viewers who may never have encountered them, FIFA is a comically grotesque organisation. In fact, telling someone about the inner workings of FIFA for the first time is a bit like showing someone two girls one cup. You do it mainly so you can watch the horrified expression on people's faces. Let's start where FIFA's current World Cup is about to take place, Brazil. The football is a religion here. And they're not exaggerating. When David Beckham got a tattoo of Jesus, the response of most soccer fans was, oh, that's huge for Jesus. That's a big deal