How to Build a Deep Community

We're so busy playing this game of one upsmanship in on observable progress, the time for building deep community just gets crowded out. My parents have known each other for 30 years and they talk to each other daily. Sometimes i feel like thy have a more active social life than i do yet. I remember in my anopique, heroic individualism stage, i wouldn't even want to walk to the coffee shop ten minutes away because it would like, take me out of my productive flow. And what's the point of doing this work and making the money anyways? There is none.