Paper Cuts cover image

By-election spin frenzy – plus Inside “manky” Buckingham Palace

Paper Cuts

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The Tories Win in Uxbridge

I'd be worried if I was Keir Starmer, having some new fresh face come in with the biggest majority lead since 1945. He seems to have a bit of personality and pep. This is a perfect time for him to learn - when he's probably safely going to come into government. Count Binface actually beat Peir's Corbin by 190 votes to 171 votes. There are no bad pictures of Binface; he's always photo-ready. Very stylish: it can't take a bad picture. The door is won, rah,. rah, rah,rah, and there's just a bloke with a bin on his head. Go, Count Bin

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