How Do I Communicate With Insecure Men?

Kim’s boss hired her to run operations and human resources at the company he founded, where he is one of four partners. Six months in, she’s baffled by his mix of behaviors, all of which have made her job much harder than it should be. He attacks nearly every modification or upgrade to a process, policy, or program she suggests. He refuses to listen to feedback. The other partners don’t dare to intervene. If it’s his (outdated) way or the highway, why did they bring her in?

She needs his support in order to make any sort of progress. What should she do? What should you do if you find yourself in a similar situation?

In this episode, Amy G talks with Kim about her situation and recommends tactics for her to try. By the end, Kim has a plan to temper his pessimism and gain his trust.

Resources:

• Getting Along: How to Work with Anyone (Even Difficult People), by Amy Gallo
• “How to Handle the Pessimist on Your Team,” by Amy Gallo
• “How to Respond to Negativity,” by Peter Bregman
• “How to Deal with the Know-It-All in Your Office,” by Priscilla Claman
• “What to Do If Your Boss Doesn’t Like You,” by Liane Davey
• “Research: Insecure Managers Don’t Want Your Suggestions,” by Nathanael J. Fast et al.

Sign up for the Women at Work newsletter.

Email us: womenatwork@hbr.org