The Real Key to Your Influence With Me Is Your Example

If your life runs hot and cold, if you're both caustic and kind, it's very hard for me to open up with you. What you say is good and fine, but it doesn't quite pertain to me. You may say you care about and appreciate me. But how can you appreciate me when you don't even understand me? All i have are your words, and i can't trust words. I'm too angry and defensive, perhaps too guilty and afraid to be influenced. Even though inside i know i need what you could tell me.