Show, don’t tell: start with your stuff

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If you've ever looked around your home and thought, "Why does this feel like it's all on me?"—this episode is for you.

Because getting another adult in your home to care about clutter can feel…impossible. Maybe your partner genuinely doesn't notice it. Maybe they help, but you're still carrying most of the mental load. Maybe they're willing, but they don't know where to start. Or maybe it's not a partner at all—maybe it's a roommate, an older kid, or another adult sharing your space.

In this episode, I'm walking you through what didn't work for me (hinting, sighing, nagging, ultimatums…yep, I tried it all) and what finally did move the needle with my husband, Andrew.

We'll talk about the subtle shifts that create real buy-in—without turning your home into a battleground or you into the project manager nobody asked for.

If you're craving more shared responsibility and less resentment, this one will help you take the next right step—starting today.

KEY TAKEAWAYS FROM THIS EPISODE: 1) Stop trying to make them care about clutter the way you do—help them feel the benefit instead

Most adults don't need to fall in love with donation bins or organizers to get on board. What they do care about is how the home feels: less friction, fewer arguments, easier routines, and the ability to actually relax at the end of the day. The breakthrough comes when they experience the difference—because showing is more powerful than telling.

2) Share your "big why" (without trying to convince them)

Sometimes your partner isn't resisting decluttering—they just don't understand what it's costing you. When you share what you're really craving on the other side (peace, ease, less anxiety, more time as a family), it often creates empathy…which creates support. And support can look like a lot of things: running donations, handling the kids while you declutter, or slowly joining you in shared spaces when they have capacity.

3) Design your home for follow-through (so it's easier for everyone to do the right thing)

What looks like "they don't care" is often just friction. Too many steps. No obvious home. Too much thinking required. So instead of arguing about behavior, adjust the environment:

• keys keep landing on the counter → add a tray where they actually get dropped

• shoes pile up by the door → put a basket right there

• stuff keeps circulating → make a visible donation bin the default

When it's easy, it happens more—without willpower, nagging, or reminders.

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