After her first attempt at suicide, she went to some creative writing courses. That encouraged her in her writing to like draw from her own experiences and write from a more like female perspective. The shift that really comes for her when the primary doctor that she is put in the care of is a woman, as opposed to the male Dr. Gordon who did such a bad job. She sees other women in this home that are like possible ways that she could go if she doesn't get better. A woman with a little botany, an old friend of hers who also dated buddy Willard.