The more viscerally painful feeling somebody else's pain is, the more likely you are to follow and how painful it all seems. But if what empathy is mostly doing is making you like lick your own empathic wounds, it's not very useful. The other component where empathy is not enough is one that calls for what I would think of as detached empathy. This is happening to you and I can do something to alleviate it. So it's self-evident that I should.

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