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You Lose the Bond, Right?
Think of it as first thing. It's uncomfortable in me. So I'm going to make you feel it as opposed to me feeling it. You made me feel this way, so now I'mgoing to... Right. That's a victim mentality. Exactly. And what happens when someone does that with me? Well the bond breaks. There's no safety and now I am going to withdraw because it doesn't feel safe. But that's part of it. Most people in relationship don't do those two things. They do one and they get lost on the detail. But they don't do the second which is to talk about how it was delivered like if you're rolling your eyes.