The ability to first observe and then serve is hugely important at the relationship level as well. If we're not good at doing that, it means that we're putting all the burden on the other person to somehow figure it out. The test of this is immense when somebody says something to us while we're listening to them,. While we're restating, while we're letting them open up, that seems to us wrong. Can we listen compassionately to the suffering of somebody else?

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