Identify the Real Problem First

Smartphones feel inevitable… until you see what early access actually does to a child’s mental health, sleep, and happiness. In this episode, Dr Justin & Kylie Coulson break down new research from Pediatrics and share the family standard that finally ended the phone wars in their home (after one very big mistake).

KEY POINTS

• New study: earlier smartphones = worse outcomes for kids.

• The four real reasons parents give phones (and why they’re flawed).

• Why “safety” doesn’t require a smartphone.

• How to replace phones with smarter solutions (incl. dumb phones + watches).

• The research consensus: delay improves outcomes.

• The family rule that ends entitlement (“when you can afford it…”).

• Boundaries if you already handed over a phone (it’s not too late).

• The real question: approval now or wellbeing later?

QUOTE OF THE EPISODE

“Kids don’t need smartphones — they need smart parents. And smart parents give their kids dumb phones.”

RESOURCES MENTIONED

• Pediatrics research on smartphone age & outcomes (referenced in episode)

• SpaceTalk Watch

• G-Mee Phone

• Free Range Kids by Lenore Skenazy

• Lisa Damour — Adolescent Psychology Resources

ACTION STEPS FOR PARENTS

1. Define the real problem you’re solving (safety, logistics, social connection, or training).

2. Offer alternatives (dumb phone, landline, watch).

3. Create a family standard — e.g. “When you can pay for it, you can have it.”

4. If they already have a phone:

   • Bedrooms & bathrooms = no-phone zones

   • No phones at meals or short car rides

   • Time limits & age limits on social media

   • Review + scale back where possible

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