In this episode we discuss how school gives you zero of the social and interpersonal skills necessary to be successful in life, the best starting point for build nonverbal communication, how to read facial expression and body language to discover hidden emotions, how to become a human lie detector, the secrets super connectors use to work a room, and much more with Vanessa Van Edwards.
Vanessa Van Edwards is the lead investigator at Science of People, a human behavior research lab. She is a Huffington Post columnist and published author. Her work has been featured on NPR, Business Week and USA Today. She has written for CNN, Fast Company and Forbes. Her latest book, Captivate, was chosen as one of Apple’s Most Anticipated Books of 2017.
We discuss:
School gives you zero of the social and interpersonal skills necessary to be successful in lifeThe skills of nonverbal communication can be learned and trainedBetween 60% and 90% of our communication is non-verbalWhy you shouldn’t put 100% of your eggs in the “verbal communication” basketHow humans give more weight to non-verbal communicationWhat is the best starting point for build nonverbal communication?The importance good eye contact & a strong handshakeWhy eye contact creates oxytocin and builds deeper connectionsThe “sweet spot” for maintaining good eye contactHow twins separated at birth have the same nonverbal affectationsWhat are micro-expressions and why they are so importantThe facial feedback hypothesis and how our faces create a feedback loopThe 7 micro-expressions that will change your lifeResearch from mental patients who lied to their doctorsHow to read facial expression (or body language) to discover hidden emotionsThe “fake science” myths around human lie detectionThe statistical cues to deceit - things that liars most often doDo “truth wizards” exist?Average person is 54% accurate in detecting liesWhat is baselining?Encoding vs DecodingWhat research on thousands of hours on TED Talks tells us about successful body language & the importance of congruencyWe cannot cover up what we feel, focus on opportunities where you can thrive instead of places where you are merely surviving “The secrets of super-connectors,” how to “work a room” and the specific patterns they use How to be someone’s "social savior”"Context conversation starters”You learn ALOT about someone from a handshakeHandshakes produce more oxytocin than 3 hours of face to face timeMake the handshake equal (firmness and direction)
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