When You've Caused Harm, but You Didn't Mean Well

When you're in a situation where you've caused harm, but you didn't intend it, and you really meant well, the first thing to do is to let go of the need to convince the other person of your intent. It can be helpful to put your hand on your chest and say,  I know i did my best. I may have hurt someone, that doesn't mean i'm a hurtful person. If some one says something about you that does ring true to you, you can take it in,. But anything that sounds like a distortion or projection, don't argue with it. Just let it be something you don't feel responsibility for or apologize for or beat yourself