Why negative memories stick

Holding space for thousands of others, primarily those who have experienced unspeakable trauma, is not for the faint of heart, nor should it be swept under the rug as simply par for the course of doing social work.

Today’s guest, Dimple Dhabalia has written a forthcoming book that’s part memoir, part manifesto—Tell Me My Story—Challenging the Narrative of Service Before Self—a must-read for humanitarian professionals. While working in the field in Zambia interviewing asylum-seekers from the Rwandan Genocide, she experienced autoimmune disease and recurring nightmares that she spent the last decade figuring out how to heal and solve for fellow service-oriented professionals.

In this conversation, Dimple shines an important light on what it’s really like to serve in this capacity, and how to do it sustainably. Only by addressing the debilitating side effects of burnout, compassion fatigue, and vicarious trauma, can humanitarian workers heal themselves while so generously serving others.

More About Dimple: Dimple Dhabalia is the founder of Roots in the Clouds, a boutique consulting firm specializing in using the power of story to heal individual and organizational trauma and moral injury. She is also a writer, podcaster, coach, and facilitator who brings over twenty years of public service experience working at the intersection of leadership, mindful awareness, and storytelling. Her first book, Tell Me My Story—Challenging the Narrative of Service Before Self launches in February 2024, and you can find her podcasts Service Without Sacrifice and What Would Ted Lasso Do? wherever you listen.

🌟 3 Key Takeaways

• There are five nervous-system survival reactions: fight, flight, freeze, fix, and fake.
• Moral injury: making choices that go against our own deeply held moral beliefs.
• There is a five-step process for moving through service-oriented work more sustainably: shaping, surviving, seeing, shifting, and sharing.

✅ Try This Next

Notice one moment of your day where you’re trying to push through. Allow yourself to stop and take three nice, deep breaths. Come back and see how you feel.

🔗 Resources Mentioned

• Dimple on the web, IG, Twitter, LinkedIn
• Substack: Dear Humanitarian
• Video: Leading Through Crisis—Human-Centered Leadership
• Article: Why selectively muting your pain isn't an option
• TV Show: Ted Lasso on Apple TV+
• Kajal Dhabalia’s Wholesome Soul

📚 Books Mentioned

• Tell Me My Story—Challenging the Narrative of Service Before Self
• Expressive Writing: Words That Heal by James W. Pennebaker
• Free Time: Lose the Busywork, Love Your Business
• Pivot: The Only Move That Matters Is Your Next One
• Life After College

🎧 Related Episodes

• Dimple’s podcasts: What Would Ted Lasso Do? and Service Without Sacrifice
• Pivot: 173: Beautiful Questions for Challenging Times with Steve Morris
• 172: Self-Care for Empaths and HSPs with Sarah Santacroce
• Free Time: 063: On Burnout and Business Intuition with Azul Terronez of Authors Who Lead

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