In psychology, there's this thing called a beautiful mesafact. We often forgive others a great deal of awkward as yet we hold ourselves to a much higher standard. The research shows that small talk creates a decline in friendship quality. When you just talk about the weather with people that you're supposed to be close to, it creates distance. And if you're a good friend, you're, you won't so most of the time, it ends up turning out very well.
Eric Barker is not a people person. “Getting me to write a relationship book,” he says, “is like asking Godzilla to improve the infrastructure in your city.” But he did it anyway. Guided by leading social psychologists, Eric went on a journey to understand what he was getting wrong about relationships — and what he could do to turn things around. The result is “Plays Well With Others,” a guide to friendship, intimacy, loneliness, and belonging that our curator Daniel Pink says will “revitalize your life.”
THIS AND THAT:
Check out Eric’s blog, “Barking Up the Wrong Tree”
Try out Arthur Aron’s intimacy building questions
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