Who Should Coordinate Care (Finding a Quarterback)

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In this deeply personal episode, Dr. Bobby reflects on his wife's cancer diagnosis and shares eight powerful lessons for anyone navigating the uncertainty of a serious illness. With insights from Dr. Helen Eshed, a board-certified gynecologic oncologist and Gail’s treating physician, this conversation blends personal experience with expert guidance to help you feel more prepared, empowered, and informed—whether for yourself or someone you love.

Together, they discuss when and why to seek a second opinion, including the importance of trusting your gut and asking your doctor how frequently they handle cases like yours. Dr. Bobby emphasizes the importance of finding a quarterback—a single provider who can oversee and coordinate all aspects of care, a role often filled by the medical oncologist or, in fortunate cases like Gail’s, by a specialist like Dr. Eshed who guides every step of the journey. They explore the nuanced role of the primary care physician, who may not lead cancer care but is critical in managing other chronic conditions and general health during treatment.

Dr. Bobby and Dr. Eshed also confront the flood of non-evidence-based treatments patients often encounter. Supplements, restrictive diets, and alternative therapies may be well-intentioned, but many lack credible evidence and can even interfere with medical treatments. Dr. Eshed underscores the importance of open communication with your doctor to discern helpful integrative therapies—such as acupuncture or massage—from those that may be harmful. If you’re unsure, bring it to your physician and evaluate together.

Another theme they unpack is the human need for agency during illness. Dr. Bobby highlights a randomized controlled trial in colon cancer survivors showing that a structured exercise program led to a 28% improvement in recurrence-free survival over eight years. This suggests that lifestyle changes like physical activity can make a real difference, even after diagnosis. But as he cautions, not everything promising on the internet is supported by research—so choose wisely and stay grounded in science.

They also touch on the emotional and spiritual dimensions of illness. From the rollercoaster of diagnoses to unexpected rituals like a gratitude ceremony for Gail’s uterus, Dr. Bobby emphasizes the value of community, spiritual support, and patient-centered rituals that help bring meaning to the process. Resources like survivorship counseling and disease-specific nonprofits can offer both information and connection during the journey.

Finally, they discuss the often-overlooked financial impact of serious illness. With treatments like surgery and immunotherapy costing thousands—even hundreds of thousands—of dollars, Dr. Bobby encourages listeners to proactively ask about costs, insurance coverage, and out-of-pocket maximums to avoid being blindsided.

Takeaways:

1. Ask the right questions early—about your diagnosis, treatment options, prognosis, and whether your doctor has experience with your specific condition.
2. Look for credible, evidence-based interventions that support your care rather than distract from it—especially when you're tempted to chase internet cures.
3. Build a strong, multi-layered support system—medical, emotional, spiritual, and financial—to help you weather the journey ahead with resilience and clarity.

Visit drbobbylivelongandwell.com
 to sign up for his free October 2nd workshop on how to focus your energy on the habits that truly improve health and longevity—without making it your full-time job.