The Scariest Animal in the World

As a kid, it was the scariest thing in the world because we would just be sitting in our house and all of those trash cans would rattle. And Florida bears are like Florida people. Unpredictable. Running from the law. They're like Trump hats. I accept that as an apology. But big cats might be even scarier. Big cats are scary. There's not a goddamn animal where you wouldn't be able to fight off a feral cat. We're made out of jelly donuts. Strength to weight ratio. That's what it is.