We tend to underestimate how hard it is for that person to say no to us. We've also shown that when people ask someone out on a date, for example, at work, who isn't interested in them. And so sort of knowing that asking for things directly does put peoplesort of on the spot. Sometimes that's ok, if we're asking for something good, that makes everybody feel good. But you also want to kind tof think twice about the things you're asking for. Because of your asking,. for example, a subordinate to do something that could be a little bit e or an appropriate or even a colleague. For those things, it's actually a lot harder for

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