The question that I deal with a lot is, did Judas repent the 30 pieces of silver, throwing it back in, running away? There does seem to be some indication that what happened is not what he had in mind. He runs back to the church with his sins and they won't forgive him. That's something, that's a terrifying thing to think about. But now you have a guy who's clearly betrayed his lord that can find no absolution anywhere,. Then figures there's no hope left for him and he runs and commits suicide. And those are two very different things.