The Challenges of Not Defeating Your Boss

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Some bosses, especially of people we know from research, like insecure bosses for example, who really do not want you to voice your opinion. You have to be able to read your manager. It's helpful to also ask permission and say, hu, you know, i have a different perspective on that. And most of the time they'll say yes. Even if they don't mean it,. They've then bought into you disagreeing and giving you a sort of tacit permission to do it.

Having a healthy, mutually beneficial relationship with your boss doesn’t require accommodating their every quirk, demand, and weakness. There are respectful, constructive ways to meet in the middle, set boundaries, and help them achieve their goals while making your competence known.

Amy G sits down with a woman who recently left retail for her first office job and a fintech executive with a marketing background to discuss managing-up practices that have helped them maintain positive, productive relationships with different bosses across their careers.

Guests:

Valerie is an operations manager at a law firm. She used to work in retail.

Mita Mallick is the head of inclusion, equity, and impact at Carta, a fintech company. She used to work in marketing. She co-hosts the podcast Brown Table Talk.

Resources:

• HBR Guide to Managing Up and Across, by Harvard Business Review

• “Setting the Record Straight on Managing Your Boss,” by Amy Gallo

• “How to Give Your Boss Feedback,” by Amy Gallo

• “Dealing with Your Incompetent Boss,” by Amy Gallo

• “When Being Indispensable Backfires,” by Mita Mallick

Email us: womenatwork@hbr.org