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The Threat of the Past
Our brains put little GPS pins and things that happened to us when we were young. And our brain has one job and one job only, and that's to get us to the next day. It doesn't mind burning through relationships or staying silent in a marriage for 48 years. If you don't deal with what happened as a kid, your frontal lobe may be able to get through each day. But your threat part of your brain will attempt to solve for that threat every minute of every day.