Becoming the Breadwinner During School Years

What happens when a Mormon woman becomes the primary provider for her family –inside a religion that teaches her highest purpose is in the home?

In this deeply personal and honest conversation, Cate Smith shares her journey growing up Mormon, internalizing the Family Proclamation, and believing her eternal destiny was marriage, motherhood, and supporting her husband. From being voted “most likely to be mom” as a teenager to entering the temple and covenanting to hearken to her husband, Cate explains how clearly her path seemed laid out for her.

But life didn't unfold the way Mormonism promised.

After earning a degree in accounting “as a backup,” Cate unexpectedly became the breadwinner, while her husband stepped into a more nurturing, stay-at-home role. What followed was grief, identity loss, social pressure, depression, and eventually therapy –along with the realization that the only thing wrong with being a working mom was being Mormon.

As Cate began questioning gender roles, authority, and worth, those questions expanded into a full faith crisis –sparked by therapy, church culture, the Family Proclamation, Ensign Peak and SEC fraud revelations, racism in church history, and the fear-based framework of Mormon belief. She shares how integrity ultimately mattered more than certainty, and why she chose to resign from the Church before she even fully believed it wasn’t true.

Cate’s story is raw, thoughtful, and deeply relatable –especially for women navigating faith, motherhood, careers, and self-trust after leaving a high-demand religion.

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Show Notes

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At Mormon Stories we explore, celebrate, and challenge Mormon culture through in-depth stories told by members and former members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as scholars, authors, LDS apologists, and other professionals.  

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