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The Four Principles of Love
Fromm breaks it down into kind of four principles. One being care that you wouldn't imagine that someone cares about a flower if they don't water it. The third principle is respect and this is designed to counteract the paternalistic aspect of caring for someone. And the final principle is that of knowledge. So the idea of really helping another person doesn't really make any sense without somehow coming into touch with what they're actually like or don't like.