Those Demands Are a Real Terms Cut in Farming Today!

There will be no more today programme until our demands are met. No more insane guest editors and a weather bulletin from Thomas Schaffenacher that simply tells you if you need an umbrella or not. Downing Street have said no to all of our demands, but have agreed to a 12% increase in dry quassel. The Prime Minister has said that whilst the ambulance strike is on, people should avoid doing anything dangerous. Please, please, please, don't do anything really dumb that's certain to end in disaster. I'll allude you're back to work, everyone.