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Do You Have Control? Yes, I'm Not Controlling. You're Relaxing
There's a tension between spontaneity and continued awareness that can come from spontaneous being in the world. If you try to force awareness, it's not going to happen. That's natural human experience. So there's a relaxation that is quite a technical word in Zogche called 'relaxation' It means relaxing into the condition in which spontaneous awareness can arise. You're not trying to make yourself mindful and check yourself for being mindful all the time. But I'm just letting myself do my thing without interference. And paradoxically, we think that the narration in the head is actually doing as good but all it's doing 99% of the time is just prohibiting us.