Moving from 'to me' to 'by me'

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A discussion on how shifting from a mindset of 'to me' to 'by me' can foster an ownership mentality and create sustainable excellence. The importance of finding one's soul's home and designing a living space that cultivates presence and recharge is also explored.

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What do leaders who sustain excellence do? They have the ability to be present for an extended period of time. They are here now. They live a life that creates a sustainable presence.
- They are fully present. Be here now. Fully here. This makes you available for this creative moment.
- Play the long game. Excellent leaders play the long game. "Live a life that creates sustainable presence."
Space and Place: It's important to know your soul's home:
- For Jim: Northern Michigan. Quiet, still, simple, in nature... "It's recharging for me."
Lead and live intentionally to get to your flow state.
Ask: What is it that creates the most "alive-ness" in you?
- Do an energy audit. Look at your calendar for the last week. What events make your energy go up, stay neutral, or go down?
- Maximize for people and events that make your energy go up. "Populate your life with what you love."
Are you willing to be fully alive? What are you willing to risk to make that happen?
- Get rid of energy downers. You can do that in 3 ways.
  - Dump it,
  - Delegate it
  - Do it differently
Responsibility – By me: I commit to taking full responsibility for the circumstances of my life, and my physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual well-being. I commit to support others to take full responsibility for their lives.
- I have to = Victim mindset
- I choose to = Ownership mindset
To me = At the effect of other things. Outside my locus of control.
By me = Inside. I am the cause of the experience. Radical responsibility. How am I causing the experience?
Josh Waitzkin - Make weather what it is. Play in the rain.
Curiosity is everything as a leader.
The opposite of curiosity is always needing/wanting to be right.
- Deconstruct all the places where you want to be right.
- Most of it stems from fear. There are three fears:
  - Approval
  - Control
  - Security
Curiosity - I commit to growing in self-awareness. I commit to regarding every interaction as an opportunity to learn. I commit to curiosity as a path to rapid learning.
Candor - I commit to saying what is true for me. I commit to being a person to whom others can express themselves with candor.
Accountability and Responsibility: Responsibility is not something that can be assigned, it is something that has to be taken. Responsibility lives in the world of integrity and impeccable agreements. Speak truth in love.
“We often describe unconscious leaders as reactive. They react from a “story” about the past or an imagined future, and their personality, ego, or mind takes over.”