2min chapter

The Way I Heard It with Mike Rowe cover image

371: Denis Chetzan and Mary Sullivan—Chuck Gets a Haircut

The Way I Heard It with Mike Rowe

CHAPTER

Conversations about Haircuts and Compliments

The chapter centers on a conversation about a haircut given by a skilled barber to the son of one of the individuals. The group shares compliments and expressions of satisfaction regarding their haircuts, displaying admiration for the barber's expertise.

00:00
Speaker 1
Like yeah, I've experienced that before. With people, when I was younger, definitely, I had a lot of like behavioral issues and people were folding like, I wear formally, like when I was a child, like families would like send us a letter of resignation. I can't, not a resident in your life. From being in your family's life. Please do not come near us. But you know, I've healed. I think what's hardest for me is the friendships that I've had to, that I've had to end, that I've ended because of my own choice. And the way that I see friendships and like romantic relationships different is with romantic relationships. I, it doesn't really, like I don't really get sad about it at first because I don't even think of romantic relationships as being like a real thing. Like I don't even believe in its existence. So in order for me to like get sad about it, I have to realize the possibility of what it could have been or what it was. And then I have to mourn that. I don't, because at first I'm like, oh yeah, well that was nothing because I was gonna see myself as nothing all the time. Which I am working on and I'm in there. Oh yeah. And it's something I'm gonna change. And so it's easier for me to be like, oh fuck that. With friendships. Because of the fact that I faced so much rejection as a child and I received all those resignation letters, I'm really not the person that has the energy of like, oh fuck that person. Fuck that. It doesn't come out of me. I actually don't get angry when it comes to ending a friendship with someone who's hurt me. It, and I don't know why because you'd think that I'd be the perfect person to tell someone off. But honestly, all that comes out of me is just compassion because I know what it's like to be rejected. But I think sometimes that hurts me because I'm not creating enough boundaries for myself. And I'm bending over backwards for someone who doesn't know how to be there for me in the way that I deserve. And so then the kind of angry stage comes like months later when I'm like, oh shit, was I really like, I was giving the girl who caught her boyfriend cheating and was like, it's okay babe, we can work it out. Like, yeah, I know this isn't you. Like that's kind of what I give sometimes. And so I have to remind myself and my friends remind me, you guys, like my worth and that I don't need to do all that stuff and that, you know, I'm just because people weren't those friends to me. Doesn't mean that I have to be mean to this person, but doesn't mean that I have to go over the top and be like that person's savior when maybe the lesson they're learning is not having me. I completely agree with that. I think I kind of look at it, and this is with friendships, relationships, lovers. I kind of see our whole life as a book. Like there's a massive, massive book. And each chapter is a different point in your life. So example, for a lover I had, they were chapter seven through nine, right? But it's chapter 11 right now. They're not in my life, but chapter 10, I was healing that time. But also chapter 10, I had a great friend, but then fast forward, it's chapter 16 and that friend wasn't there, isn't there here, isn't here right now, but they served a purpose during that time and I'm grateful. And I think important is bowing out gracefully when it's time. Exactly, like people are in your life for long reasons or seasons. And even the people in my life that have radically hurt me and I agree with- Is there a lifetime option? Yeah, like for long reasons, you guys are my lifetimes. You guys are my lifetimes. You guys are my lifetimes. Oh, I thought I was for like a tiny reason. No, no, no. For long reasons or seasons. And I like very much relate to Josie, the hardest relationships that I felt like the largest heartbreak for me is when I have to leave, like a friendship. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Because it's like, oh, we have so much history.

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