I'm a Fogky Mess, but What's That?

i think that there's something so sacred about having a private relationship and having it all to yourself. And i think that making relationships public can make it lose some of the magic. I don't want to feel like i'm being used either, cause that's a huge fear of mine. Why am i rushing my life though?  I should be like living it day by day. Maybe it's the fact that we're in coved situation, maybe that's making me want to settle down or whatever. Because it's like i'm already like, not doing much. Probably when things start happening again, i'm going to regret saying that.