Women and Credit Takers - What's the Difference?

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I observed that women frequently said we when talking about something they personally had done or accomplished. I also observed men saying, i about things thatthey were not individually personally responsible for. And i think that has a lot to do with our sense of what's appropriate. A lot of these ways of speaking that women have taken for granted or as somor appropriate, it's realistic. The phenomenon i an referred to is the double bind. We have expectations for how women should speak and if they don't fulfil those expectations, people don't like em. It's a challenge to find some middle ground.

Have you ever been in a meeting and shared an idea, only to have it ignored? Then, 10 minutes later, a guy shares the same idea, and your boss says “Great idea!” (Grrr.) Or maybe you’ve been told you apologize too much, don’t speak up enough, or that you need more “confidence” or “leadership presence.” (Ugh.) In this episode, we tackle three aspects of communication: first, how and why women’s speech patterns differ from men’s; second, how women can be more assertive in meetings; and third, how women can deal with interrupters (since the science shows women get interrupted more often than men do). Guests: Deborah Tannen is a professor of linguistics at Georgetown University. She is best known as the author of the bestseller “You Just Don't Understand: Women and Men in Conversation.” Jill Flynn is a founding partner at Flynn Heath Holt Leadership. Amy Gallo is an HBR contributing editor and author of the “HBR Guide to Dealing with Conflict.” Our theme music is Matt Hill’s “City In Motion,” provided by Audio Network. For links to the articles mentioned in this episode, as well as other information about the show, visit hbr.org/podcasts/women-at-work.