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What Are You Afraid Of?
A lot of guys your age and even older than you get into this headspace where they aim for where they think they should be. You can't fix anything from the past all you can do is learn from it and apply it to your life. Your issue isn't ability It's not ambition, it's self-sabotage. The thing you need Is a company to give you a paycheck to validate that you are a functional member of society.